Supervisor Training...

I participated in my first Supervisory Training Course. I'm required to get Supervisory Certification and need to take classes, etc. This was a week-long one called "Effective Supervisory Training". The class was held at the City Hall building and it was with other city employees. (Sheriff, Mosquito Control, etc.) It was enlightening - but long. I hated being out of the library for a whole week and I started making lists of things I needed to get done when I got back. I don't know how I could of avoided it. I'm required to complete this Certification program in the next year - and these classes are only offered at specific times. I'm glad it's finished and it looks like the other required courses are only a few hours long each. I can do that.
So, all week long one of the things I was worried about was this family program that I was in charge of. It was related to the Chesapeake "One book, one community" event. The book they chose was about a boy and his interaction with the first all-black Coast Guard. I helped arrange a program about shipwrecks and coast guard rescues off of Virginia Beach. This lady came and shared a presentation. Ok, that wasn't what I was stressing about - it was the attendance. We require registration for our programs, so we know how many to plan for, etc. Hardly anyone signed up for this program - and not for a lack of trying. I posted posters and handed out bookmarks - but it wasn't enough. I should have been contacting patrons, who came a similar program in the past, a month in advance and also got a press release into the local paper. I'm not in the habit of doing those things and it blew up in my face, unfortunately. I did have 7 people show up for the program, which is better than nothing, but I still feel bad that the library sponsored this low-attended activity. Well, this definitely was a learning experience! I know now what needs to be done to have more attendance for a program.
Monday, I'm still feeling bad about this Coast Guard program the previous Sat. and was dreading talking to my manager, Jean, about it. She pulled me aside and we talked. She was candid with me and told me that she was worried about my performance and how I was doing. She said they had a different impression of me at my phone interview and hoped that I would of had more experience. She did say that she was glad I was a nice person and not cocky - but she wanted me to step up. I felt so ashamed and even started crying a bit (talk about embarrassing). She quickly wrapped things up, asking me to "get in the fast lane", and she let me leave. I had a hard time concentrating the rest of the afternoon (with my blood-shot eyes) and as soon as I got home I broke down. I talked with Mom and Dad, and even my Branch President about what to do next and I got lots of good advice and even a priesthood blessing. I did a lot of thinking and list-making and eventually was able to get to sleep that night.
I fasted that next day and went in a little early to work to start getting in control of the my job. Jean was out of town and I was so grateful for the tender mercy. I needed the alone time to think and plan. I studied our department calendar, I started delegated some of my duties, and started feeling more in control. I held a staff meeting the next week and we talked about my place in the department and how we all can work together as a team. I haven't had another talk with Jean, but I did tell her in passing, at the end of that week, that I felt better about what was going on in the Children's Department and felt more in control. She didn't say much, but just reminded me to "stay in the fast lane". I think things are going better and I feel more confidence when I see Jean walk into the room. Keep me in your prayers that I can have the skills and confidence to achieve in this job! There are no other options - I have to succeed!